I love my children.

Everyday I wake up, I'm thankful for the little blessings God has gave me. My son Jacob is my mini me, he's so much like me. It may be hard at times, but its all worth it. I'm molding them with my love and attention so they can grow up to be healthy adults. My favorite word is Mommy, there is so much behind that one word.

The twins are almost a month old!

I get no sleep, and its not the babies fault. Its social media's fault. I need to take naps when they sleep but I turn to facebook or twitter.

My twins are breastfeed and formula feed. I have Zola on Neosure but I'm going to switch to enfacare. I've used Enfamil with Jacob and it's easy to mix and the smell isn't that bad. Nursing the twins is hard! My boobs hurt and the pain is sometimes unbearable. Zev latches on perfectly but Zola doesn't. I think its cause she so small and she can't open her mouth as wide as Zev does, or it can be nipple confusion. Idk but I'm so happy Zev latches on good cause I hate pumping and I rather just have him nurse. I have the Medela pump and I have a good amount of milk stored so far but I feel like a cow being milked. I barely pump with Jacob, plus it was easier cause it was only one baby and he nursed well. When Jacob was about 3 months he started latching on wrong, and OMG the pain! I had to stop nursing him for a few weeks so I can heal and we had him on formula. He seemed to like formula after that so I kept giving him formula plus the breastmilk. Jacob was a very chubby baby, chubby and happy. So I just bought a Medela nipple shield online and I'm going to use that when I nurse Zola. But other than that everything is going great.

TWINS!

My twin pregnancy and their birth

THE TWINS ARE HERE!

Zola Clair and Zev Carter were born on September 11th 2014. Zola was born at 12:50pm and Zev was born at 1:04pm, I think I got the time right, everything was a blur that day. On September 10th I came in for a ultrasound, and things changed fast. Zola was much smaller than Zev and she was in distress. The doctor told me that I should go to Labor and Delivery right away. They were all very serious and it kinda made me panic. I wasn't expecting to have the babies that day, I was hoping maybe they will give me a induction date for that following week. So me and my mom rushed over to the labor and delivery floor with no hospital bag or birthing plan.
Everything moved so fast, I couldn't believe they were going to be born. So they gave me a room and hooked me up to iv's and stuff and gave me pitocin. When I came to the hospital I was already 4 cm dilated so that made things even faster. The pitocin didn't work for about 5 hours. Then around midnight I started to feel a little cramping. It wasn't anything bad till that next morning. I woke up with an oxygen mask on, and I have no idea when that happened, my mom said something about my oxygen levels were low when I was sleeping. But that next morning was hell. I was so close to getting an epidural, but I didn't. The real contraction pains came that morning. I couldn't think, breathe or move!
I felt Zola coming down, It was like something dropped "down there."  So my mother rushed out to get a doctor cause I wanted to epidural and the nurse had a nerve to tell me it will take about 2 hours till I can get the epidural. TWO HOURS, so I broke down after that, I was in shock and I now knew that I'm going to push twins out with no epidural. So my doctor came in to check me and he said I was fully dilated. Everyone was shocked cause it all happened fast. So they rolled me over to the o.r. to deliver. They were about 2 doctors and 8 nurses in the room with me. I hate the operation room, it was so bright. Everyone was shocked that I had no epidural and I think my mom almost fainted. She never saw a live birth (she missed Jacob's by a few minutes). Zola was only 3.9 pounds when she was born and didn't have to go to the nicu. Zev flipped after Zola came out. So he came out breech (butt first) and was a lot easier than pushing out Zola. Zev was a lot bigger than his big sister, he was 5.3 pounds. They didn't cry much, they were very calm babies. The whole process was pretty fast and unexpected, but.I would't want to go though it again!

Jacob's First Day of School

School

My babe is in AIT training, my son is in kindergarten (and my step son), and my nephew is in 10th grade. My son currently lives with his dad while he goes to school. The school is on the same block as his house so I feel like its safe. Jacob got a sticker today cause he drew a cool looking monster, he was so happy about it. Jacob seems to love school. On the first day he almost had a melt down but I think it was cause me. He always gets very emotional around me, he needs mommies hugs and kisses. So I tried to dodge all the teachers (they were kicking the parents out) so I can just give him that last words of encouragement, and it worked. I'm going to upload the video of the whole experience very soon, excuse my winy voice :)

ONE YEAR ANNIVERSARY!

I really think it was love at first sight. I remember our first date like it was yesterday. Tim picked me up at my house in his car and soon as I saw him I had even bigger crush on him. It wasn't any awkward silence, which was a plus. We planned on going to get sushi but every place we went to was weird, he found out how picky I was on the first date.After passing 5 sushi restaurants we finally found one. The food was amazing and the whole scene was perfect. I was so scared on the first date, he was staring into my eyes every time I said something, and I was talking a lot cause I was very nervous. We talked and talked and I fell for him. I really believe Tim is my soul mate. The date ended late and we went back to his house. We looked at movies and chilled, it was awesome. The next day I checked his facebook and he wrote a little statues about us, I seriously felt like a teenager. I love him with all my heart and I'm proud to call him my husband. He's a great father and step father and I can't wait to see how he is with TWINS. And now he's going to be a dad to a little girl. Poor Zola, her dad is in the army, she has 3 brothers,and a noisy mom... guys will be scared to date her. 

Aldi

The first time I went to Aldi's was 2 years ago in Rhode Island, and I fell in love. At first I was kinda creeped out by how low the prices where, I kept asking myself how safe is this. A year later I found out there was a Aldi walking distance from my house in NYC. I was so excited and my mother fell in love with it too. I think the first time we went, we only bought a few things cause we weren't sure about the quality of the food. Two years later and we still shop there. I've tried about everything there. I think I have a low immune system and get sick easily and nothing from Aldi's has gotten me sick lol. I love their prices, for 30 bucks you can get a lot.

My favorite things from Aldi are:
Pretzels
Mandarin oranges in a cup
hot coco
Peanut butter and jelly (together)
Pizza
bacon
biscuits
hash browns
ice cream
bread
fries
meats (burger meat)
and some other stuff I can't think of right now :)

35 weeks!

Excuse the mess in the back, I was packing my son's school bag and trying to figure out how I want the room to look and than kinda gave up cause I got tired lol.

What to pack for your hospital bag

Tired all the time

Acid reflex is crazy. Everything i eat makes me sick and I use the bathroom more than ever. I seriously pee every 30 mins and its a lot each time. When i was pregnant with J i went though the same thing towards the end (the last week). I hope i have about 2 weeks left...i want my little bundles of joy in my arms already.

My Hubby and Step Son

So adorable <3>

Still pregnant

And these Braxton Hicks suck! I really thought I was going into labor last week.

I'm goldie locks

NOTHING IS COMFORTABLE! I was laying on the couch but I kept getting cramps, I laid on my mother's bed and again kept getting cramps and now I'm in my bed and it sucks too. I have been getting cramps and tightness with a lot of kicking every hour for the past 3 hours, and they only last for a minute. Does that sound like labor pains or Braxton Hicks? When I was younger I use to get really bad cramps every time aunt flow came. My cramps literally made me faint sometimes, and no pills helped. So I had to chart my menstrual cycle and start taking pain killers a day before it came, so I won't suffer. But these cramps feel like cramps but the beginning stage ( the warning ) and I feel like I'm going to throw up. So idk whats up,and water doesn't help. Will I go into labor on my birthday (tomorrow) or what. I can't even describe how I feel, I just feel crappy. I know I've been rushing their arrival, but I'm not ready yet, plus I hope they aren't to small. Zev should be around 5 pounds and Zola should almost be about 5 pounds. I can't even focus enough to type, and I'm so tired.

SZA- Childs Play

SZA LYRICS

                                                                      "Childs Play"
                                                           (feat. Chance The Rapper)

[Verse 1 - SZA:]
Ripping heads off all my Barbie dolls
Toss them to the side, give them convertibles
Click boom, I like the way your ride's up
Can't have it all, skip the wanted boy
Watching from the sidelines, wish that she had it
She wish that she had it
Hearing a bad guy, build in a fantasy
Fuck reality, do you want to know, know, me
Do you want to know?
Stuck in Nintendo, get the controller
Street Fighter sin search
I'll finish him
(Down goes Frazier!)
I'll finish him
Come Desdemona
Othello the tragedies
Shakespearean sorrows
When do I begin?
When do we begin?

[Verse 2 - Chance The Rapper:]
I got L's on my record
Weed on the vinyl
Keys open doors when them keys are albino
I'll knock on my door when my stars is aline-o
I've been fishing for a minute for a minnow
Only I know that a pawn is a trade
And a rookie for a castle like tuition for a final
Playin' hooky for a tassle, spend a minute on the minor
Winds on my window
Ash on my skin, when the record low temps for the wind blow
Only write rhythm to the tardiest of tempos
Only ride shotgun when the car is a limo
Y'ar see
My crowd surf in a cypher
Scuba in my shower, take an uber to my neighbors
Used to pay the piper, till peter picked it better
Now the first thing you should tell is where the hell is all the paper
But memories keep coming back
All the nights that we used to laugh
Wanna know how I used to was, how I used to was

[Outro x5 - SZA and Chance the Rapper:]
Memories keep playing back, all nights we used to love
Just wondering how we used to was, how we used to was

34 weeks tomorrow!

If I go into labor, the hospital won't stop it now. My doctor also said at the rate the twins are going with their weight will make it safe. But I had a lot of braxton hicks about 2 weeks ago but they stopped. I took a 3 hour walk with my son and mother today and I felt great. I have a feeling I might make it to the end of September, which is like about 3 weeks from now. My poor stomach, these stretch marks are going get worst.

33 weeks

33 weeks and stretch marks

Falling asleep while eating ?

I woke up at 10 am and went back to sleep around 11:30. I woke up around 1:30 and made some food, then now I'm eating some fruit and I think I'm falling asleep while eating. I'm always tired, and this all just started about a week ago.

Waiting

My pregnancy with my son Jacob was easy, but I had preeclampsia. The pregnancy was a high risk so they induced me. My doctor pretty much asked me what date do you want to come in to give birth and i picked the 8th and J was here the 9th, but when I came in I was already 3cm dilated so if I didn't come in that day J would of been born on the 9th either way. So his due date was planned but not planned.

With the twins I'm high risk again only cause I'm having multiples. I kinda still have high blood pressure but I take pills and now its normal, so it is controlled. But my doctor isn't really forcing an induction. I feel like these babies are gonna come when THEY want to come, which I think is in a few weeks.  My health is good  and the babies are healthy (just too small to be born) but I'm starting to feel the pains and aches of carrying twins. 

Arie

Creepy things doctors say

"ohh you have a great looking cervix"

" your uterus is perfect"

I know these are common comments when you get checked down there, but it's all in the tone. 

Zola's kicks and Zev's punches

They are SUPER strong and painful yet ticklish. I feel like my stomach can't get any bigger, I have so many stretch marks already. When I was at the doctors, my doctor was surprised how big I got in just two weeks. And she also was surprised how many new stretch marks I had. She mad a finny joke saying I guess you'll be wearing one pieces at the beach. I laughed cause I'm thinking the same thing, psh maybe I shouldn't, If I wanna wear a two piece, I can do it. I have 3 kids, and these are my motherhood stripes! lol ...These babies have a ton of energy already and I don't eat much sugar, so Its not a sugar rush. I really wonder when they sleep, or do they move in their sleep. I move a lot when I sleep so maybe they are gonna be like me, cause daddy sleeps like a rock and doesn't move much. My doctor said I should be feeling more signs of labor round 34 weeks, which is in 2 weeks. But she also thinks I could make it to October which is nuts! Give me a C Section September 8th and I'll be a happy camper :) 

Doctor appointment

My blood pressure was 96/88 which is the lowest I ever seen in YEARS! My doctor was shocked and happy cause for someone carrying twins, it's pretty great. My heart rate is average so nothing to worry about. I weight 153 now so I've gained 25 pounds so far in this pregnancy. My doctor said most women that are slim before pregnancy should gain about 30 to 40 pounds, so I'm almost there. She actually told me I can gain more weight ( she means she wants me to gain more weight lol ) I eat a lot but it's always been hard for me to gain weight fast. All the weight I'm gaining are the babies, so after I deliver I'll be back down to 127 or so. 
The mall at bay plaza (bronx, ny) finally opened today. Its nice I guess, but not much stores were open. Forever 21 wasn't open yet, and I love that store. I met a mother of twins at the mall., she had 2 three month old fraternal twins. They were so tiny and cuuuute, thats going to be me in a few months.
Today was a loooong day and now I can finally relax.

Ultrasound

Only Zev again, Zola is vertex (head down) and Zev's legs were in the way. This is a clearer picture of him (kinda lol ). Zev is breech and he is 4.1 pounds, while Zola is still head down and 3.9 pounds. Zev was head down just last week, and Zola use to be breech but flipped. They can change again, but I think a c-section is in my future.

32 weeks and stretch mark city

My son's 5th Birthday with my mom and nephew

Sounds from my belly ?

When the babies are moving, I'll hear a clicking (snapping) noise. I had it with my first son, but this time it's louder.

32 weeks tomorrow

I could have only a few weeks left, and maybe just maybe next month around this time, they could be here.  Anything after 35 weeks will be safe for the babies, and that's only 3weeks away. My 24th birthday in coming up (aug28), and these babies will be an awesome birthday gift. My son's 5th birthday was on the 9th and was super fun. My mom, my nephew and I look J to Chuck E Cheese, and omg, they were to many kids there. I'll post pictures soon.

IN PAIN!

I woke up this morning and my breast are in so much pain. The pain feels like I'm engorged but I haven't started feeding yet. They have gotten a lot bigger in the past few weeks, so I guess they are just preparing to feed twins.

I woke up this morning starving. I felt like I haven't ate in 2 days. And sadly I ate A LOT of stuff yesterday that I regret. I ate 3 Cinnabons, when I wasn't pregnant I can hardly eat half of one. So now I'm eating a huge bowl of Frosted Flacks with bananas, yummy in my tummy  

Home alone.

Isn't it so weird when your home alone and you hear noises. I'm not crazy ya'll its just like old furniture making noises and stuff, still kinda creeps me out.

I'm 31 weeks and one day today and I just feel crappy. I woke up around 12:15 ish and I'm already tired again. All I ate was two pieces of toast and a banana and strawberry smoothie and a glass of water. I'm actually full and but I'm always thirsty! 

By the way I had a ultrasound yesterday and their umbilical cords are functioning correctly! But they did say the babies are on the smaller end, but I think they are only talking about Zola. It's so weird cause some websites say Zola is right on track and Zev is big, but my doctor said the is weighing normal for a girl and Zev is weighing normal for a boy. I did not get a non stress test cause they move so much and its obvious to everyone. Sometimes my ultrasounds take so much longer cause they can't stop moving, which is a great thing. A moving baby is a healthy baby. But I have another ultrasound on the 13th and its the same thing again. So that should be a bit boring, but don't get me wrong I love seeing them. They look the same every week so not much difference but these ultrasounds always make me so sleepy.

I'm so scared of going into labor before 35 weeks. I got 4 more weeks till the paranoia goes away. A baby can survive at 31 weeks and possibly go home within a few weeks but then there are some cases where the baby has to stay months in the NICU. My Zola was 2.11 pounds at 30 weeks and my Zev was 3.9 pounds. So I'm guessing Zev is already 4 pounds or so and Zola is over 3 pounds. But i have no idea, at this rate they should be around 5 or 6 pounds at 35 weeks :)  

This pregnancy

Has destroyed my skin even more. I keep getting pimples and of course I don't leave them alone, and then they leave a mark. I had one on my chest, on near my lip and one on my foot. I also have freckles now, which is very odd. They are on my checks . I have a ton of beauty marks that popped up in the second trimester. I have 5 on my stomach, one on my chin, and a ton on my arms. The pimple near my lip was annoying so i scratched it in my sleep ( I know bad idea) but now if left a mark, and it stings. I feels like the after math feeling when you get burned while cooking or something. It looks like a burn but I don't remember getting burned on my face, unless it was a old burn I finally peeled off. IDK, this pregnancy is going to make me wear make-up. My lips are always dry, no matter how much chapstick i put on. I drink a lot of water cause I heard sometimes that can help (dehydration). I've never used concealer, but I guess I'm gonna try it, I usually only wear some lipstick and that is it. : /

YAY

Everything so far is fine with the babies and their weight is normal for their gender. But I still have to go back to the doc next week just to make sure. :)

30 weeks

So this ultrasound didn't go as planned BUT one great thing is that Zola is head down (baby A) now, but Zev is a little slanted. Zola is 2 pounds and 11 ounces and Zev is 3 pounds and 9 ounces, so Zola is almost 3 pounds and Zev is almost 4. They are a pound apart, and apparently that is a bad things with fraternal twins. I've read so many stories online about people in the same situation, and it scared me. Some people said they had to be induced at 35 weeks, because of the weight difference. Their heart rate is normal, its just their weight that is a little off. I have my prenatal appointment tomorrow so I'll ask more questions. I have to go to get a Fetal Testing  and Doppler study next week and the week after that. With the Fetal testing BPP I'll get a non stress test, and the Doppler study takes a closer look at the umbilical cords functions and blood flow within the babies.

MY FEET!

My feet are swollen now, and I don't know why. I've read if you drink a lot of water, your feet and hands won't swell. WHYYYYYYYYYY. I have about a month or so left in this pregnancy, and now this. I don't want my hands to swell, just not my hands pleaseeeee!!!!

Crazy new pain...or tickle...

It just happened and it was so weird.  It felt like my girls foot kicked my hip bone and then pushed it. It actually tickled me aand wasn't painful.

Saturday!!

My hubby made it to Augusta, GA safely and he loves it. I read so many crazy negative stories about Fort Gordon and it made both of us paranoid for a while, but again every ones experience is different. He even seems much happier on the phone which makes me happy, when we use to talk when he was in Basic Training he sounded like a zombie, but now he sounds like his old self, back to the Timo I know and looooove.
So day three of weird cramping. I found out that I was constipated, and that is all. So now I'm getting a weird pain in my hips, butt and pelvic area. I think Zev head is causing that pain. Plus I'm having two babies and the weight of Zola and Zev are effecting my lower area. I guess this all means my birthing time is near. They still kick a lot, and I think they kick more than ever. More stretch marks, which is horrible! My stomach got pretty big is such a short time so I guess stretch marks were bound to happen. I have a sonogram this Wednesday and I can't wait. 

My Soldier

He looks so much younger without facial hair, but VERY handsome indeed :)

29 week belly

Now I'm about 90% ready!

I finally ordered My Brest Friend Twin nursing pillow, I hope this will help. And I got the best thing I ever bought while breastfeeding my son Jacob. Lanolin nipple cream works wonders, its like a little bit of magic. When I nursed my son I got major cracked nipples and it was very painful. Sometimes he wouldn't latch on right and I totally regret not checking. I had to nurse on one breast for a month till I found the best product to help, I think it permanently changed my breast size, which is weird. But when I put this product on, It fully heeled within 2 days, and was able to nurse the 3rd day with no pain. Oh yeah my son is starting kindergartner September 8th (the day I hope to go in labor) and I'm about 80% ready for that but only 20% ready mentally. He's still my baby, my almost 5 year old (Aug9th) baby. He's gonna still be a baby to me when hes 21. He is my first and me and him are so close. Now I'm gonna have 3 BABIES forever. I don't see Arie as a baby, He's my little man. He's so independent, sometimes I feel like he has an old soul. Although Jacob is the oldest I see Arie as being the oldest. I love my mini family ^_^